I am not on the wrong path… I just need to recalibrate.
(Published on Substack on February 2026)
That is the sentence I sent to my friend this morning after having a very emotional and upsetting conversation yesterday about feeling on the wrong path, lost, and having no clue about where I am going. Clearly, I was having a very bad day.
When we are in “the rot,” as I call it, it’s hard to see any perspective. Is it all bad? Are we actually on the wrong path? In my case, it was, “How did I get stuck here again?”
It’s not that everything is bad. Two weeks ago, I was sending voice notes to my friend, telling her how happy I was that slowly I was creating the life I want.
I have the skeleton, the main structure. Now it’s time to tweak it.
It’s like when I’m working with clay. I create the main shape of the piece, and then I chip away the excess and refine the small details that make the piece one of a kind.
So what happened? I lost perspective, I got dysregulated, and my body went into panic mode as it brought up memories of past years that made me feel like I was stuck in the same pattern again.
In this case, I’m giving energy to something that isn’t quite where I see myself long term. In the past, I found myself in situations that didn’t feel aligned either. Different circumstances, but a similar trigger, the feeling of not fully choosing the direction I was in. I know we don’t get to control everything. We have responsibilities and commitments. But we do get to decide how we respond, what we learn, and when it’s time to adjust course.
It’s funny because one of the things I need to put into practice at work is teaching a three year old that we cannot change the trigger, but we can change how we react to it. We move, we find our space. For context, she doesn’t like to share space with her baby brother, lol.
But let’s take this to a grown-up context. How many times do we get stuck and let the trigger control us? Yes, sometimes we cannot just leave whatever it is that is triggering us but, what can I do to learn from that trigger? Is there a different way to approach it? Can we have the hard conversations about what is bothering us and actually do something about it?
Because we know something is bothering us. Some people go quietly, trying to ignore it. Others choose to say it out loud. But are we actually doing something about it?
I always like to think that there is something to learn, or as my teacher says, “Is there anything here I need to learn that I cannot learn in any other way?” Yeah, I am learning that I am not a tree and that I can move and change direction.
Maybe this is teaching me to discover a new path. Maybe it’s pushing me to dare to do the things I actually want to do. Am I going to be able to get a job doing what I love? Maybe, maybe not. But how will I know if I don’t pull the trigger?
Maybe that is what triggers do. They help us move, change, and go towards our dreams. I might not have one big dream, but I have many little ones, and it’s time to let them come through.
A friend was talking about wish lists, those endless lists where we put all the things we want to do, but they often stay wish lists. It’s time to move those dreams into the done list.
In my case, I am taking this trigger as a sign that I am meant to adjust direction. And, as Google Maps does when you miss a turn, it’s time to recalibrate.